I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
I did a mental Irish jig when he pulled out the second condom.
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
He rubbed my back afterwards. I forgot how to talk and I legitimately thought I was a cat for a few minutes.
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
There should be a guide book that probation officers hand out on "how to tell a tinder girl about your ankle monitor before she notices it at the worst possible moment"
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
Randomize
