One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
A guy in a sombrero stopped to take a picture with me sitting on the curb.
Whatever. I just smoked another bowl so I don't care and wow I just noticed how fast my thumb moves when I text. I'm amazing.
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
That moment when your whole family facetimed you just moments before you threw up all over the entire living room
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
Randomize
