So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
Apparently the library doesn't care about celebrating the day Jesus became a zombie.
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
just used my nephews bottle to take my birth control
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
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