I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
STOP FUCKING TELLING PEOPLE ABOUT THAT TIME THAT GUY CAME ON MY FACE WHILE I WAS ASLEEP!!!
A toast to whoever set this year's daylight savings fallback to the day after halloween, granting us another hour to detox before we pretend to be functional adults. Clearly, a partier with forethought and clear priorities. Cheers!
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
On a scale of one to Harambe, how attached were you to your goldfish?
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
Randomize