they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
I think my grandma died before she was convinced I was straight
Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
I'm sorry I drunk dialed you before realizing that you were already in bed with me.
He kept walking up to every girl at the party saying "Hi, I'm George Clooney. No I won't marry you." He left with three girls.
You know it's been a successful day when the only reason you put on a bra was to take off your shirt
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
I'm chatting on my fake OkCupid account and watching Lion Witch & Wardrobe on my second screen. Hail me, King of the Creepers
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
I'm going to need you to stop harassing my professor on Twitter when you're drunk.
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
Randomize
