Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
They're making scrambled eggs at 2 in the morning... with rum
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
I woke up at 3am, my head in a toilet, still at the kegger, wearing a random cowboy hat.
Carrying your underwear around in your purse on Sunday morning is its own religious experience
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
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