where does the pee come out of this thing
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
I woke up to ritz crackers on the lawn, a keystone behind the hedge and puke on the rental car... i think that we have become that house...
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
You kept apologizing for not offering me some of your Whisky, which you referred to as "Jesus Nectar".
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
Meanwhile she's getting her law degree and I'm dropping Cool Ranch Doritos down my bra because I'm laying down eating on the couch
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
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