They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
LSHMSFOAIDMT = laughing so hard my sombrero falls off and I drop my taco.
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
My vibrator broke.
Dude it's been less than twelve hours. Did you sleep?
Don't worry about that. I need a new vibrator.
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
Randomize
