dude wtf did we explode in my microwave last night?
idk but i think it had a face
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
You texted me 'I am the leopard prince', with a series of pictures of you posing in what seemed like cat poses. you were not "a little bit" drunk dude..
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn.
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
Randomize
