Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
I don't understand how he can't hear himself snoring, but he'll wake up to me sneaking m&m's from my junk food stash beside the bed...
I had to go to the front counter of the restaurant and ask for the key because I was "pretty sure my friend is passed out in the bathroom right now"
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
I am the girl who goes to bed with her make-up on so that she doesn't have to fully redo it in the morning. I am obviously not ready to be a mother.
How does that even work?
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
Dude on the shuttle bus eating a Butterfinger and watch porn on his phone and doesn’t give a fuck who knows
We need to get on his level
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