i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
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