so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
I've made my dad a martini every night since I was 13.. I got this
That awesome feeling when you are pooping on the same toilet that nobel laureates have pooped on
Well I just put wine in my tea
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
Randomize
