its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
Fyi when u order four mini bottles of scotch on a 45 min flight. The flight attendants jaw drops to the floor.
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
I wish on days I started my period Chipotle would come to my house with a burrito bar ... Then give me a chocolate cake and a large beer.
The cab driver gave me a church card yesterday and said I should reconnect with god.
Then he gave me 2 tickets to a movie he's going to be in
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
I am the girl who goes to bed with her make-up on so that she doesn't have to fully redo it in the morning. I am obviously not ready to be a mother.
How does that even work?
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
My new roommate is awesome. His father owns a bar and his sister has an E cup. I'm going to be with him forever
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
Randomize
