he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
The sky will open, cue choir of angels: "oh! wow! Matt was right! Not only will I grow out my bush, but I'm going to date straight, available men!"
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.
Successful day.
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
Whenever you get off. By "pick me up from work" I mean, "pick me up from a bar by work at your earliest convenience" :)
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
He carried you out but the best part is you kept saying "can't I keep dancing" as you were gushing blood
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
I never thought my gollum impression would lead to me getting laid.
Huzzah!
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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