it wasn't lemon gatorade
Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
how do flat chested girls get laid?
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
MASS TEXT! MASS TEXT! Your sad horny friend has finally gotten it in and can go back to being normal once again. You're welcome.
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
My little brother found me on Instagram. If I'm not already the shame of my family, I'm about to be.
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
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