So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
I swear, if he gets me a bowling ball for Christmas, I will throw it at him.
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
I swear they were about to hook up!!
I know because I was in the tub taking an imaginary silent bath. They stopped cuz I gagged on my shot.
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
I can't feel my tongue. And that means go. Green means go. And you know what Barney says. Green means go and woah means no. DRIIIIINKK
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
you ripped my door off of the hinges, kicked it in half and then proceeded to throw it down the stairs because i wouldn't make you a cheese burger
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
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