Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
I'm not trying to alarm you guys, but I think I just swallowed a ketchup packet.
Do you think we could brew coffee with beer? I'm thinking a hazelnut Guinnesspresso can only end with pure awesome.
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
Why can't all sociopaths be as fabulous as me?
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
Oh god he’s a clown I fucked a rodeo clown
Randomize
