I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
you were huddled over the toilet, throwing up, and every few seconds you'd look up and say "this is such a waste of vodka" then put your head back down and start puking again
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
Randomize
