is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
on the way to work, i saw an empty wine bottle sitting in the middle of an intersection. i thought of you.
i can respect that.
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
Was I asleep on the ride home?
Yea, then when I tried to hold your head up on a turn, you round house punched me in the face.
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
Just found my glass of wine on top of the litter box. Every argument ever is invalid.
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
Let's get the cat blown out
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
I woke up this morning hand cuffed to the bed with three bruised ribs and Amy written in lipstick on my chest... what happen lastnite??
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Randomize
