i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
woke up on my stairs with half a hot dog beside me and the last text I sent was "i make hot dog in toasTer" .
I'm sorry I put you in the washing machine. I honestly thought you would fit.
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
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