69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
Like I could never be a lawyer because I would just look like a porn star impersonation of a lawyer.
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
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