the guy I was hooking up with asked me if he could wear a guerilla suit during sex.
Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
apparently my new 420 ritual is to look at the clock at 4:20 and realize i'm already too high
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
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