you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
I misunderstood what a threesome is. Please come pick me up.
Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
Your mom just threw up on me. Please come home.
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
Gonna send a picture of my negative pregnancy test with the message "Merry Christmas" to the guys I've been sleeping with. That alone, will put a huge dent in my shopping list of gifts for people.
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
Watching the blind side bc I need a good cry to make sure I'm still human after this weekend's questionable life choices
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
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