i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
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