i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
the guy i hooked up with is asleep on our couch. please dont fuck him.
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
When you sober up and come in here, I'm in your bed because you pissed on me in mine. So fuck. Off.
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
You know I think I am ok with him not moving in yet. He came over, fixed my closet, ate me out, and left. I'm now in sweats drinking coke and rum and watching new girl. This works for me.
My breasts were aching with rage.
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
There's a quesaritto in the oven. Neither of us have been to Taco Bell in 3 weeks.
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
I need someone to sew my vagina shut until I'm responsible enough to use it
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
Randomize
