I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
Now would be a good time to set your alarm to pick me up from jail in the morning.
Puked in a plastic neiman Marcus bag while driving. My biggest accomplishment yet
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
And my cousin was so drunk he called an uber and instead he got into a cop car and they took him to the hospital
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
Oh. My. God. I. Am. Going. To. Punch. Someone. In. The. Face. Immediately.
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
Randomize
