I just realized that "Hey girl, when you gonna let me tap that?" is in iambic pentameter. I'm going to write a poem...
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.
They have 12 kegs and 40 bottles of liquor and a pool with a diving board. And hardly anyone at this wedding knows me. Should be a great night
I lost my flask somewhere between dancing shirtless to The Spice Girls and walking around Wawa opening/eating things and putting them back.
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
He was eating me out on a samsung washing machine and as soon as I came, I heard the "end of cycle" song. That tune will now always remind me of the screaming, multiple orgasms I recieved tonight!
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