just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
We can't have sex anymore. The amount of money I've spent on meds and copays for UTIs is getting ridiculous
Just saw a woman walking a golden retriever and a vacuum down the road. I miss downtown.
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
Gold rum. Strong marijuana. Jabba the Hut in stilettos. Deep thigh bruise. Yes, thal all happened. Sorry dude.
I'm starting to think my role in the world is to inject batshit crazy, mentally unbalanced chicks with a dose of normal sperm.
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
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