Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
Randomize
