if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
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