I swear if she hugs me I'm going to bleach my body
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
the problem with open bar is i never know what to get
did you really just start a sentence with "the problem with open bar is..."
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
Best part: she drunkenly told me I'm dangerous then slurred to my parents that I should watch out in case I fall in love with her. Then she mounted a pinata
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
Put an egg in my coffee filter this morning. I think I am still drunk.
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
Randomize
