He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
My boss just gave me full permission to come into work wasted this weekend.
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
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