Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
You know you hit rock bottom when you make out with a guy named after a cereal.
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander.
Watching porn with a bag of marshmallows. Thats when you know you're stoned.
Sign she's a keeper: "I would rather be late to brunch than waste a perfectly good boner."
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
I just got out of a $280 speeding ticket by acting like The Big Lebowski. Seriously Jeff Bridges is the man.
Randomize
