we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
just threw up on dog. broke microwave with cheese and spoon. having a bath with my barbies singing final countdown.
before you ask yes i found the absinthe under your bed. ITS THE FINAL COUNTDOWWWWNNNNNN
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
I woke up while eating peanut butter from a jar. I don't think I should be social today.
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
So stoned that I pressed the unlock button on my car keys to walk into my bedroom...
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
Randomize
