I would like to feed your fingertips to the wolverines.
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
Just flooded the bathroom while masturbating in the shower. Managed to squeege most of it up. Desperately need to get laid.
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
you said you wanted to call me grandma and give me hugs
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
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