I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
He told me that he wishes our relationship was more like prison: less touching, more butt sex.
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
yo dude not sure how this happened but im drunk at your house eating burritos with your mom and sister. hope you're having fun in new zealand
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
Randomize
