North Korea, Best Korea!
Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
Last time Jon threw a party I woke up on my porch, no shirt but 4 bras on, and "make better life choices" written on my stomach in sharpie
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
from across the room i saw you look into your beer and whisper "i love you"
Randomize
