I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
Pregaming before going to drink with a girl from Russia. Please make sure I'm not dead in the morning.
She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
Lost my pants last night. Really need to stop taking shots of whiskey like I'm eating skittles.
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
Randomize
