i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
No one's ever called me intergalactic cocksucker, before.
What does it say about me that I feel completely charmed right now?
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
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