I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
you wrote "5 million dollars" in the tip line for the pizza delivery man and insisted that he deserves it
last thing I heard her say before I passed out was 'this is great. I never get to be the big spoon.'
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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