no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
One of my residents in my hall just found my positive pregnancy test from last year I hid behind the fridge, I'm just going to tell them it was for a science project.
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
I'm gonna die fat and alone and all they will find is pizza crusts
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
Well, I hope you're having fun. I'm just gonna lay here and wait for death - shouldn't be long now.
to be fair i didnt know she wanted to sleep with me
WHY THE FUCK ELSE WOULD SHE DRAG A STRAIGT MAN INTO A VICTORIA'S SECRET CHANGEROOM GODDAMMIT
Randomize
