dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
I hate when laundry day is determined by the number of cum stains on my bed
His hands were made for my vagina.
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
I just spent 20 minutes in a Subway trying to take a candid photo of the doppleganger of the guy I lost my virginity to instead of eating. That's all the evidence I need that my life is on track.
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
Randomize