Needless to say when I told my parents they loved me less
Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
sweetheart all i remember is you throwing up and saying "i thought things would be better now that barack obama is president"
splinters make it hard to masturbate
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
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