Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
You tried to impress her by kicking the 5th floor button in the elevator, but you ended up kicking everything from 3 to 11. Then you said, "pretty accurate, huh ladies?"
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
Dude. Woke up this morning wearing that chick's panties. 8/10, would recommend. I love tequila.
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
Omg I joined a choir last night...
Randomize
