Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
wait a second... your telling me you want me to take you to the bank at 10 on a tuesday so you can buy a blow up pool and fill it with beer?
yes... and buy you lunch
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
Have invented new cocktail. Any flavor of crystal light and vodka. I call it "I am going to die alone"
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
Hey do you remember me?
You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
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