dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
If everyone lived like me, we would need 5.9 earths. Fuck yes america.
after we finished, she said she had been a backup performer for Cirque du Soleil. THAT flexible.
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
...Just this whole adulting thing gets in the way of mermaid drag shows at lesbian bars.
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
What are best friends for?
Picking your clothes up from a one night stand you had nearly 2 months ago
don't take offense to this but at the strip club tonight I legit believed one girl was you. almost hopped on stage and freaked out at you. you're a beauty.
There's a difference tho. *I* drink at seven in the morning because I work graveyards. YOU drink at seven in the morning cause you're an alcoholic.
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