so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
first time Ive ever had to stop sex to go pass out in the kitchen floor...
oh vodka. i could write you a sonnet.
he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
I mistook a propane tank for a keg.
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
Siri just reminded me to pickup Plan B
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
My ex just sent me a message asking if she could blow me, but only if we get caught by her new bf. If she promises to swallow I'm doing it.
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
Trying to put a fitted sheet on drunk is one of the boss levels of slutty adulthood.
Randomize