May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
we're out of white wine, toilet paper and windex... too hard to explain via text
I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
I'm about to take plan-b with a glass of wine and ramen noodles. I cannot decide who will hurt more...my vagina, my kidneys or my pride.
Randomize