Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
I'm so bummed I missed coconut bowling. It's fucking cold here and no coconuts to be found
I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
I know it basically makes me the worst feminist ever, but I don't want to kill my own spiders. And I will pay my personal spider hit man with sammiches and unlimited , uninhibited access to my vagina.
He had a drawn-on fu manchu and now my vagina has one too.
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
Do not confuse my plans for being an adult though. I will ABSOLUTELY be practicing suturing, on my porch, while getting stoned.
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
Randomize
