it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
I just left the house and 2 chicks are in the kitchen making breakfast. Might want to get up.
I'm up, no shirt, and staring at a breakfast casserole. Who are these girls?
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
Dude, sorry for live texting you my binge drinking. If you'd like me to do the same for my hangover, I can share that I just had to sit down while q-tipping my ears.
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
I was woken up at 6 am by a second grader trying to give me a sweatshirt for a pillow
We can't go back there. Ever. No context required, just know it's true.
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
"can you come pick me up from the ikea parking garage i think i slept here"
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
Randomize
