Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
This santa hat i wore to the bar, served it's dual purpose as a vomit bag.
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
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